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Please meet Redge, who is probably some aspirational model of daddydom I have buried deep inside of me. There are seven daddies - Mat, Craig, Joseph, Hugo, Damien, Robert, and Brian - each with his own virtues, issues, hobbies, and foibles.

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Throughout the game you can choose which daddies you want to go on dates with: Do you want to get coffee with the barista indie-rock dad? Do wind sprints with bro dad?

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Go fishing with the competitive beard dad? Chaperone a dance with the married dad?

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Each daddy is a snowflake and your tongue is just hanging out there to catch them all. Over the next few days, I went on two dates with each dad, at which point I had to make the Choice: pick a dad to go on a third date with, which triggers the end of the game.

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Depending on your narrative decisions, these endings can range from a happily ever after to ones that are like, DamnDream Daddy. So this ranking of daddies is necessarily subjective, because it is about the daddy that my dadsona, i.

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my drunk self on a Thursday night, wants to be with. These are my favorite dads, graded by dreaminess and daddiness.

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It also happens that his wife Mary is a bitter alcoholic who is clearly cheating on him. Damien is Goth Dad, or as he would be preferred to be called, Victorian Dad. He gets annoyed if you call his cape a cloak.

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And while his obsession with graveyards, gardens, and handwritten letters would no doubt make for a very good podcast, the whole thing feels like a fancy episode of Victorian Slum House.

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Brian is a picturesque Dream Daddy dad. He sports a fantastic belly and full beard that makes you want to rub it with a fine oil. He does real typical dad things like fishing and fixing things and bragging about his precocious adolescent daughter Daisy.

He does seem like a really good dad. Mat is the sexy, hipster dad who runs the Coffee Spoon. He collects records, makes music, and has a daughter named Carmensita, who wears those big grandma glasses that are all the rage in Bushwick.

He is the perfect daddy to smoke up with and listen to the National on his record player. Craig is the hot guy who used to do keg stands at Lambda Phi Epsilon, but has since replaced the beer with protein shakes and baby carriers.

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  The daddies of Dream Daddy - Mat, Craig, Joseph, Hugo, Damien, Robert, and Brian - ranked from worst to best   At 70, Calvin Klein is one silver daddy who isn't slowing down. The designer's relationship with pretty boy Nick Gruber - 47 years his junior - might have been tumultuous, but it was never   Photos of Mostly Dads, Mostly Naked. John C. Fry, a.k.a. Tank's Takes, specializes in the substantial, the hairy, and the grizzled. But there are some smooth younger types thrown in like Estimated Reading Time: 1 min

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